My parents always said, “Get an education. You could grow up to be a doctor! Or a lawyer! Maybe even the president!” After a little research, I’ve come to discover that pre-med and pre-law are not the only known successful degrees offered at college campuses across the nation. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the MRS. Degree. Known mostly for its considerable success rate, the MRS. Degree is achieved by a thorough search of prestigious college campuses across the United States in an attempt to acquire a handsome and financially sound young man. I think that’s the official definition anyway. In simpler terms, why become a doctor when you could marry one? That’s the primary goal of the institution, but perhaps we should take a look at the inspiration for such a goal and the necessary courses required to obtain it.
Factually speaking, choosing a man as a partner is similar to choosing your class schedule. For instance, you’ve got your basic core classes like biology, chemistry, and economics. Well, with spouses, everyone clearly wants someone with good genes (biology), a strong provider for the family (economics), and someone that they are genuinely attracted to (chemistry). I think it’s safe to say that chemistry homework might not be so bad after all! But all innuendos aside, these are the basic attributes that are expected of a spouse. Of course, based on preference, you might throw in some various electives such as Humor 1101 and Rock Star 2100. Nevertheless, a woman in search of her MRS. Degree could argue that there is a variety of prerequisites and course requirements needed to complete her degree.
Now let’s get real. How many times have you heard the old adage, “there are plenty of fish in the sea?” Or how about “You’ll make lifelong friends at college; you might even find the person you’re meant to marry?” For high school students, these statements are thrown around like a football on Saturday. I can’t even begin to count how many times my own mother has asked me if I’ve seen any cute boys yet. And where are there more “fish,” or cute boys to be more direct, than on a college campus of 34,000, 40% of which are male? Nowhere! Now, don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of fish all around the world but you’ll never find a more concentrated collection of smart, attractive men of your own peer group than on a college campus.
So maybe, just maybe, there is some basis for this MRS. Degree. After all, many of us were raised around love and affection, told that we may find our soul mates at college, and then thrown into an environment full of people who share our interests. So, no, you shouldn’t go to college with the sole purpose of finding the perfect man who makes your chemistry homework more bearable. But while you are at college, you should be open to the advantages of being around men who are ambitious and who you have a lot in common with. Because in the end, who doesn’t fall in love with that idea? And honestly, who wants to thrive on success alone?
© Sarah Palmer, 15 December 2012